Christmas card 2012. Welcome 2013! Year 1 of Wonderment!

It is a great relief for me to really ask questions. I wrote the following Christmas card to a friend that also left the church this year:
"The Butlers are enjoying life outside the 'one true and living gospel of Jesus Christ' and have chosen to celebrate the season without the traditional guilty associations of 'the reason'. We love humanity and draw comfort from education and technological innovation that makes mankind more successful at coexisting. David and Thomas are excited to be out of young men's and like not being constantly harassed about normal sexual interest, which they previously had found awkward for boys their ages. And Jenny is learning that her place is not necessarily in the home but may be at the head of a corporation, as a high-powered lawyer, or in a loving, committed lesbian relationship before it will necessarily be on the arm of a man that will see her as a baby making machine. The point is, even if she does choose motherhood, she is going to live her life to the fullest before she decides to accept a traditional gender role. Sammy is full of love and life and now wakes up on Sunday without his usual "aw man! I hate church!" Now he looks forward to the zoo, the aquarium, hiking in the Appalachians and the extra time with a father free of the burden of a day full of correlatory meetings. Christmas is a time we celebrate the blessings and gifts that we have received. The Butlers lost the sense of having the one true plan but they gained a sense of wonder and excitement at discovery of a world unknown. Life is a gift and the Butlers received it this year in a way more profound and remarkable than they ever have before. They wish you and yours happiness and appreciation of life. They wish peace for humanity and goodwill to all."

While the context of a annual Christmas message was a joke, the message is very close to my current feelings. I am going to make decisions based on how I feel with a healthy dose of contextual understanding. I believe that too many of the traditions in the church are influenced by prior generations. Blacks and the Priesthood was a holdover from a racist generation. Women and the Priesthood is a holdover from a misogynistic generation. Homosexuals and marriage is a holdover from a homophobic generation. For far too long, my thinking has been crafted by Victorian ideals of right and wrong. I love being able to ask "why is it wrong?" I don't think this is the same as moral relativism. I love having a close friend in Emily to share the experience of discovery with. I love that our kids will get to discover life without fear and guilt. They are, in a sense, pioneers. They will get to learn to navigate life without the burden of constant fear that they will cross God. Many would say, "Oh! They lost their precious anchor!" To them, I reply, "Thank God for anchors of morality and respect for humanity, but Thank God for the ability to weigh anchor, and head out to sea to explore without regret. To see without fear. To question without knowing what you might find."

JB